Governor LePage, er, “Lewiston Mayor Bob MacDonald” on “Elusive Central American Children” Goes Off On Both Dems & The RailsOccasionally it is always nice to read some of the smaller and more locally focused publications around the state, such as the Auburn based Twin City Times, to see what folks are supposedly saying.
“Twin City Times” just happens to be edited and published by Maine Governor Paul LePage’s communications director Peter Steele. Make note of that fact, because it’s kinda important.
One can get a real feel for the sentiments locally of what is happening in Augusta by checking these papers out, especially if that region’s elected officials take to their keyboards and submit opinion pieces of note for their constituents’ consideration.But when the governor’s own head press guy is editing, then publishing the articles himself, there is the nagging feeling that possibly Paul LePage said it himself.
This rings especially true in light of recent revelations that according to Mike Tipping’s “As Maine Went”, LePage in January 2010 created the pseudonym “ForThePeople” as to be able to post anonymously and write a series of posts to sway voters and help himself in that year’s Republican primary.
So there is a very VERY strong perception here that “Lewiston Mayor Bob Macdonald” is in reality a really badly hidden sockpuppet version of Maine Governor Paul LePage. While it makes sense, it is also a rather strange twist, considering in the past it was LePage who was reported to be the “puppet”.
Want some proof?
We present to you a reminder in the form of “Exhibit A”: “Is LePage’s “Outrage” A Politicized Continuation Of Ongoing General Assistance/ Immigrant Battle?”
And now “Exhibit B”: Quite something now, isn’t it?
The GOP in Maine must be just thrilled that Paul LePage, who has a history of meeting with dangerous fringe elements within his own party, er, “holds regular meetings with ALL of his constituents (wink wink)“, has somehow managed not to even be in the same room as THIS guy.
So let’s wipe the copious spittle off “MacDonald’s” lil screed and work our way down through all of this.
Oh where, oh where to begin? Oh where, oh where to begin?
- Those “elusive Central American children” are NOT at the Blaine House, nor does Paul LePage know where they are.
(He knows. He looked.)
- President Obama may headline a Shenna Bellows for Senate fundraiser in Bar Harbor, which is currently overrun by filthy rich drunken Chinese tourists!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be “gussying up” golf courses for Obama!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be learning English at those golf courses!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be hiding in tents on Democratic gubernatorial candidate Mike Michaud’s Northern Maine property!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be hiding in an abandoned house in Millinocket!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be housed in a federal facility!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be in Macdonald’s own city of Lewiston!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be at the VA’s Community Based Outpatient Clinic on Challenger Drive!
(Okay, going after gubernatorial opponent Mike Michaud- this we could have seen coming a mile away.)
But sheesh- do we know where the little tykes AREN’T?
- Those “elusive Central American children” ARE MOST DEFINITELY NOT in Cape Elizabeth.
Back to those “elusive Central American children”. Where were we?
Oh yes… the next stop on the “Macdonald-LePage” crazy train is a short, but to “Macdonald” and “Macdonald” alone, logical run from Cape Elizabeth to Portland.
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be at Senate President Justin Alfond’s cosmopolitan house in Portland, stealing the silver spoons!
(Hmm, Maine is a big place, though. Better widen the scope.)
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be hiding with Paul Bunyan!
(Getting warmer- wait for it…)
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be hiding with the “Paul Bunyan of Northern Maine”, Senate Majority Leader Troy Jackson!
- Those “elusive Central American children” could be in Allagash, an “uncharted land [that] would make a perfect clandestine place to set up a refugee/ asylum-seeker camp.”
(DING DING DING! We have a winnah!)
How do you figure THIS one, Governor LePage, er, “Mayor Macdonald”? Inquiring minds have got to know what the voices inside your head are saying. Could you elaborate a bit?
- “Jackson’s roots are planted firmly in the Allagash.”
(Yes, yes they are.)
More specifically, we know of the long standing feud you, er, “Governor LePage” have had with Senator Jackson.
Oh, sorry- not “Governor LePage”, but “Lewiston Mayor Bob Macdonald”.
Man, this IS confusing.
Do please continue, sir.
- Those “elusive Central American children” now “thousands of Spanish-speaking illegals”, will be “indoctrinated into the tenets of Progressive Democratic philosophies”.
But wait, there is more about “Camp Commandant Jackson” and his nefarious plans.
- “Once camp commandant Jackson is satisfied that these new Democrats possess the qualities needed to be good progressives, they will be released into all Maine counties to bilingually spread the gospel of the common man, a.k.a. progressive political propaganda.”
Okay, enough already. Seriously, just stop.
The article goes on to look at suspects Emily Cain and Mark Eves, but you get the gist. Although to have whoever authored this article talk about psychological needs is remarkable.
And just wait until “Lewiston Mayor Bob MacDonald” catches wind of – cue the ominous music-
Waiting for the “LePage/Macdonald/whoever” press release with a joint statement that Stephen King’s Bangor home is the hiding spot for those “elusive Central American children” in three… two… one…